Inspired by Chang Shou Mian for Lunar New Year
Happy Lunar New Year! The Year of the Ox begins in 2 days. This weekend, Jamie went to Chinatown, got a ton of noodles (other recipes here), and is excited about some at-home Zoom celebrations.
Thanks to Julia for the tip to change our newsletter article names. Also, we realized that Substack is filtering our emails into the Promotions tab, so not all of y'all are seeing the emails. So we're asking if you could drag the email into your Primary Inbox or mark this email as "Important" or star it, which should move this email into your primary inbox. That way, the algorithm learns to not put our emails in the Promotions tab. 🥰
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<3 Melinda and Jamie
News Headlines
🎒 The DOJ dropped the lawsuit against Yale that accused the school of discriminating against white and Asian American undergrad applicants. The suit, which was part of Trump's attempt to discourage affirmative action policies, was filed back in October. A similar Harvard suit was rejected by a Boston federal appeals court. (NPR)
🗽 South Asian Americans, an ideologically diverse group that leans Democrat, tap into their ethnic communities for early campaign funding and political support. An analysis of South Asians running for Congress showed that ethnicity is a significant predictor of campaign contributions for AAPI individuals. Candidates appeal most to those with similar backgrounds (ie. the study found that Indians donate to Indians, Chinese to Chinese candidates, etc.), but building larger coalitions has been more difficult. I thought there were interesting ideological considerations here, especially with debate over US foreign policy and support for policies in India/Modi among immigrants. (FiveThirtyEight + The Juggernaut)
😠 There have been a string of attacks and robberies of Asian elders in major cities in the weeks leading up to Lunar New Year. Much of these attacks were unprovoked, including the attack of an 84-year-old Thai man, Vicha Ratanapakdee, who died of his injuries days later. As anti-Asian rhetoric and hate incidents rise in reaction to the pandemic, there's a debate in the community about the role of policing in these attacks. Actors Daniel Dae Kim and Daniel Wu are offering a $25k reward for the assailant in the Oakland attacks, but others like John Yang, CEO of Asian Americans Advancing Justice, are advocating for "cross-racial ... coalition-building" to hold people accountable. (NBC)
😢 Famous Asian American photographer, Corky Lee, died recently of COVID. An activist of his own right in AAPI spaces, he helped get Chinese translations on NYC ballots, helped document Chinese Americans' "contributions to history", and captured moments of injustice and one of community.
Source: NBC
👴🏻 Really this is just an amusing story: Taiwan's biggest Pokémon Go fan and his 72 phones thwarted by an earthquake alert system (Nextshark)
TIL… S*x Ed
hey all, so the topic of s*x ed is very near and dear to me, as someone who's really passionate about women's health and started an IG on it. While I was taking a Gender & Health class my last semester in college, I was able to write a piece on how young Asian American women like me are introduced to such topics—that is, with shame, stigma, confusion, and frustration. I adapted parts of it to fit here. This is SUCH A BIG TOPIC, and I'd be incredibly happy to talk more with anyone on this. (I'm using the * just in case Substack is like IG b/c IG is sort of shadow-banning our women's health content.)
Starting with ~ menstruation ~
I recently learned that when my mother experienced her first period, her mother (my grandmother) had not told her anything about it. After hiding her dirtied underwear and panicking that she may be dying of a disease, my mother finally told my grandmother about the bleeding, to which she simply handed her a cloth pad and said, “this will happen every month.” When considering the context of how our Asian immigrant parents encountered s*xual and reproductive health (SRH), we can better understand our experience, education, and attitudes towards it (and I mainly speak to the perspective of U.S.-born daughters). 40+ years later, this same conversation my mom had still happened - in her 2016 editorial, Thy Vo describes that when she got her first period, her mother simply showed her where the pads were stored and said, “don’t forget to do the laundry.” Vo interviewed Jenny Tang, who similar to my mom, had thought she was dying when she first saw blood on her underwear.
Source: Niraj Gera's series titled "Sacred Stains"
Starting with periods, arguably one of our first direct experiences with SRH, many Asian parents are not upfront about it and perpetuate taboos that they grew up with. For example, many of my friends and I were not given tampons to use because it apparently meant losing our virginity/purity because we're sticking them into our vaginas (um this is just not true). When one girl asked her younger brother to bring over pads to her, her mother yelled at her. My friend's mother never let herself or her daughter enter the temple when they were menstruating because blood is "dirty." This shame is where it all starts, where it's normalized to feel embarrassed and in the dark about what's happening to our bodies. As Senti Sojwal says here in this fantastic article on why Asian Americans need better sex ed, "It’s not that I blame my mother or any Asian parent. ...she just didn’t have the tools, resources, and knowledge to do that kind of education herself." (this is how I feel, too)
Omg, young people have s*x??
The hush-hush and stigma that our parents usually portray, combined with really inadequate s*x education at school, leads many of us to feel ashamed, lost, and panicked even years later. Even when parents do try to bring up a serious SRH topic, the conversation can be incomplete, awkward, “too little too late,” and again, laced with shame and misunderstanding.
Some studies show how Asian American women may have worse sexual health outcomes given factors related to cultural stigma. Let me share some of what I read.
After citing a study on how teens who receive information on sex from parents are more likely to use contraception, Vo discussed concerning studies on how parents were found to be the least reported source of sex education for Asian American college-aged women. It wasn't a coincidence, perhaps, that Asian American women have been found to be the least likely among racial groups to use protection in their lifetimes, with one study finding that college-aged Chinese and Filipina women use withdrawal at higher rates than the national average. Another study found that 40% of AAPI women have had unprotected sex in their lifetimes, the highest rate of all racial groups.
This is sort of complicated though, as we know that (1) this is referring to only heteros*xual relationships and (2) pressure to not use condoms is a real thing (3) there are many factors as to why Asian American women might not have access or knowledge to forms of birth control.
Relationship Dynamics
Getting back to (2) here - I actually got the chance to talk to researcher Dr. Chris Hahm, who's authored several papers like this one on sexual health and HIV risk behaviors among young Asian American women. She's found that, "This cultural expectation for women to be submissive and accommodating affects her ability to have discussions about HIV risk and consistent condom use. In fact, APIA women who perceived to have lower relationship power were significantly more likely to be engaged in HIV related risk behaviors.”
Even though I consider myself to be a headstrong person, I definitely felt the pressure to be accommodating when it came to sx, assuming that I'd feel less pleasure as the woman in a heterosxual relationship and that I wouldn't be able to insist on what I preferred (which is sometimes not further with s*x. You can read here on an experience of mine around this). I think these relationship dynamics are tied to how when growing up in Asian families, we don't usually have our boundaries fully respected and aren't able to voice our needs.
Source: Rose Feduk via Thy Vo's article
The author of another paper I read said that across Asian ethnicities, she noticed how growing up, women absorb negative attitudes around sx and values like “primacy of family...appropriation of sexuality only after marriage.” This reminds me of Thy Vo's mom, who despite wanting to tell her daughter more about these topics, was held back by her husband, who did not want his high school daughters knowing about sx. Her mother wanted to fulfill traditional expectations of an obedient wife in the hopes of appeasing an abusive husband and causing less conflict in the family. (ah, the patriarchy!)
Culturally competent s*x ed and healthcare is very needed!!
Even when we go to the doctor, we still might not feel comfortable discussing or talking about our SRH needs. Katherine Du cites a study in her NPR article that revealed how Asian American teens, who sincerely wanted to learn more about their sexual health, felt that doctors assumed they wouldn’t need information on s*x, likely due to stereotypes. The researchers of the study hoped doctors could better initiate trust-building with young people and emphasize patient confidentiality so that teens don't feel like they have to lie about their s*xual health.
Source: Joy Velasco, via Mochi Mag
Years later too, when we're older, healthcare providers who don't understand our cultural upbringing might give off attitudes that don't make us feel safe. And we continue to feel hesitant to talk about SRH and seek care or help. Hmong American Lyia Jalao felt that "there are not many family planning or reproductive health forms or workshops that are catered to the Southeast Asian community. I believe that this lack in reproductive health dialogue puts many Hmong girls and women in harm’s way."
So, with parents, schools, and doctors all not being the trusted and safe places to get s*xual health info, most of us turn to our friends and the internet. Resources online and conversations on social media have been sort of a godsend for topics that are really not talked about enough and we might feel nervous to ask about, like exploring your s*xuality, LGBTQ+ s*x ed, m*sturbation, s*xual fantasies, non-monogamy, UTIs/yeast infections, painful s*x, birth control options, etc. And honestly, even simple topics like what even is the menstrual cycle and how one gets pregnant... TLDR knowledge is power, especially if it's coming through a culturally competent lens!
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Some Resources
I didn't get to a lot of topics in the above, but hopefully, it's a start for more exploration! A few places to start:
💻 Senti Sojwal (who I mentioned earlier) is moderating this panel as part of Asian American Feminist Collective's event on Decolonizing S*x Ed - it's tomorrow, Thursday 2/11, at 6pm ET and I'm going to be tuning in! Sign up here.
📖 I didn't get to go in depth on these, but these articles are essential reading: Senti Sojwal's, NBC Asian America's, Margaret Cho's
📱Us! Please DM us on Twitter @around_thetable or Insta @around_thetable_ if you want more articles, websites, podcast episodes, or documentaries on s*x ed and women's health generally.
Small Feelings
Return of the small feelings section smh after not having a single thought since early November. Anyways, I feel a lot of what was said above. I’ve seen an interesting trend of startups come up around AAPI women’s mental and also around s*xual health and wellbeing and I just think that’s kinda cool.
Also, we had a really interesting conversation about work and identity the other day, so we’re curious about what other people think about this: How does your racial and ethnic identity show up in your professional life? How do you want it to show up (or not)? Are these conversations you have with your coworkers? Friends?
✨ S P O T L I G H T ✨
Hi! We want to engage our readers more, and we would love to know any AAPI individuals or groups that you think are cool. Fill out the nomination form, and we'll write a spotlight about them!
Chef's Specials
👨🏾 I remember being happy to hear about this man in India, who noticed the taboos around periods and affordability of pads and started making cheaper yet high-quality pads. He was ostracized by society at first, and this effort, "consumed nine years of his life and nearly cost him his marriage."
🏮 Support Chinatowns this Lunar New Year! They are incredible places of culture but have been struggling since the beginning of the pandemic. You can help by buying produce and goods, donating to nonprofits, or contributing to other initiatives. See more here.
🏏 I was a founding member of my high school's cricket club and I'm excited to see it become more popular in the US. Major League Cricket... coming in 2022.
🗾 "The only samurai colony ever attempted outside of Japan was in California" (Katie Dowd for SFGATE)
🍿 "Steven Yeun on 'Minari' and seeing Asian America as its own third culture" (Diep Tran for NBC Asian America)